i've started to feel lonely even when i'm amongst people. i feel like screaming and runing away. when i'm alone in my apartment, i can't focus on anything. the only thing i've been doing recently in my apartment, is to watch tv or listening intense to a record while staring out of the window. i haven't opened a book for days now. it isn't a good thing. i have to stop feeling this way...i have to stop talking. i have to disappear completely.