i think i got an apartment in kolding today. i'm not sure yet...in a couple of days i know for sure. i want to go back so badly. it's funny huh? just as much as i wanted to go up here, just as much i feel like going back to kolding now. heh. well...my life is back there. my school. my work. most of my closest friends and maybe even...you. so i have to get back as soon as possible before i get too lonely up here.

i haven't been outside a door today though the weather has been very nice. i just don't feel like going outside when i'm finally up here. unless i have an urgency or something. isn't that a bad sign? i also experience having more and more nightmares. some nights ago it was an emotional nightmare. but last night....last night i woke up around 3:30am believing that a ghost of a killed doll was standing beside my bed ready to kill me. how fucked is that ?! i had to turn on the lights to ensure that she wasn't there. and only thoughts of people i care about made me calm down again. i felt so lonely.

i'm getting better at being alone though. in the daytime. but i hate the nights and evenings.

i'm going back to kolding tomorrow to stay there for a couple of days. it's gonna be nice.