i'm spending incredible much time on my own at the moment. i can really feel that my good ol' friends have left town. yesterday i had even forgot that i had a room mate because we hadn't seen each other for over a day. the fall is showing it's face here in town...yesterday night i couldn't sleep for thoughts and for something squeaking somewhere outside ind the windy darkness...the only thing rocking me to sleep was the trees singing in the wind. see...our apartment are surrounded by huuuuge old old trees, so every time it's windy or the rain is falling you can hear it very clearly...it's so cosy.

back to the loneliness...you should think that you didn't get lonely living together with a friend...but you're wrong. we spend a lot of time in separate rooms of the apartment when we're finally home on the same time...even the refrigerator and the freezer is divided in two...hers and my part. if you ask me i think it's a waste and frustrating..but she thinks the other way around and doesn't care about the waste. i try not to think too much about it.

you're maybe wondering how come i can feel so lonely when i'm almost constantly surrounded by people where ever i go in my everyday life (mainly because of the student house)...to be honest i can't give you the precise answer...but i think it implies something with my past and my need to some how get more or less rid of it...i don't know. 'cause on the same time it's a huge part of me...hmmm.

you gotta love that melancholy huh?!